Patriarchy Interrupted: Differential Realizations and Manifestations of Power in Butch/Femme Relationships

This auto-theoretical essay explores femme and butch as differential identities, expressed through the very specific gender performances of lesbian identity—fem(me)ininity and mas(k)ulinity. We revisit a night spent together as a means of cocreating the understanding of lesbian habitus and the space lesbians occupy when they come together sexually. We interrogate what this means for our own gender performances and expressions of power both within our relationship and in the broader world. Beginning with the term fe(me)ininity and moving through the call for feminist scholarship to create new language, we offer mas(k)ulinity as a new way to frame the subversive performance of butchness. We suggest that the spaces created by femme/butch pairings, ones that manifest fem(me)ininity and mas(k)ulinity, reorient power within relationships, and have the potential to disrupt patriarchal forms of gendered control.